Wednesday, December 21, 2005

back in the atmosphere

It's 10:41. p.m. Evening. If I open the blinds, it's dark outside. Well, it would be dark if it weren't for the damn street light on the corner.

I'm sitting at my desk. Bottle of cherry vanilla Dr. Pepper, almost gone. Bag of Reese's pieces, also almost gone. "Drops of Jupiter" playing with enough static that if I cared more I'd do something about it. Pile of bills. My checkbook. Dead ink cartridge. Post-it notes. The filing cabinet is open with fifty brand-new hanging files waiting to hold something.

Funny how typing random things will make you think. I'm multi-tasking tonight. I'm thinking about finishing the task of organizing my study, how that will mean that next I have to organize my room, about inviting A to lunch tomorrow, about the cost of groceries, about how everyone leaves, and now about holding someone.

I'm getting used to sitting in my study working, trying to get my music loud enough that it doesn't distract me too much but still covers Sister and her fiance's whispering and giggling and laughing and kissing. I keep reminding myself that it will go away. They get married in a few weeks. I'll get a new roommate. Sister is on the LGN (look good naked) diet/exercise routine. I'm on the who-gives-a-damn diet, as detailed above.

LittleSister sent me an e-postcard today. She's excited for us (Sister and me) to come home, but she asked me to not fight because it makes her sad. For the record, and because I can't say it to her, I never set out for home planning on fighting, although it often happens. Oddly enough, being at home intensifies all the loneliness and worthlessness and depression(ness) I feel so often in Provo. Shouldn't it be the other way around? Anyway, I mentioned it to my mother, who added LittleSister's other two worries, swearing and caffeine. I promised to avoid both as much as humanly possible.

Back to cleaning. Sometimes I just wish I were somewhere else. The moon, maybe.


Melyngoch said...

Okay, so, I should have checked out your blog about the time you became an Official Fob, but we'll just skip the excuses and say better late than never. You're a brilliant writer. Despite the problems of us both existing at the same time, I kind of think we should be friends.

Rajat Kala said...

nice blog.

erin said...

There's a problem with you and AA.M existing at the same time???

erin said...

Oh and I love Drops of Jupiter. Great song.

And if ARC was getting married this semester, I'd come be your roommate.

I just like to spread out my comments to make you feel special. :)

B.G. Christensen said...

Yes, it's unfortunate, but Melyngoch and editorgirl pose a threat to the universe when they are in the same place at the same time because they are both incarnations of the deity known as Fob #4. (Sorry, eg, it's not your fault you're number four--Melyngoch was the fourth to join, so blame her.) I suspect, though, that it's safe for them to occupy the same part of the blogosphere at the same time without causing any galactic implosions.

Melyngoch said...

editorgirl! we're deities!

B.G. Christensen said...

Ahem. You are not deities, you are a deity. Two incarnations of the same deity, just like there are several incarnations of Avalokitesvara, Buddha, or Madonna.

Thirdmango said...

So... Two heads on one body perhaps? Ancient mythological demon, the evil foreboding Melyngirl.

Tolkien Boy said...

I have both imbibed caffeine and sworn casually around my brother, who has similar hangups.

So far, the universe is still ordered.


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