Deal Breakers, Rules of

[Note: I stole from Lauren and Grover. Thank you.]

.

Deal breakers must provide specific, concrete details. I will not date men with hair longer than mine. The best looking man is never the best looking man when he’s wearing a ponytail featuring ringlets that would rival Shirley Temple and the Good Ship Lollypop.

or

Deal breakers must be anecdotal. I will not date men who listen to religious/inspirational music and select Broadway soundtracks. At the end of a religious singer/songwriter’s concert, the audience was asked to join hands for the final inspiring number. The song ended, but my date refused to let go of my hand.

or

Deal breakers must enforce stereotypes. Love me, love my friends. And if my friends hate you, you’re toast.

or

Deal breakers must be self-explanatory. Mass murderer.

or

Deal breakers must be irrational. If you can’t love Journey, don’t bother loving me. Men who use Bic pens. Men who talk through movie trailers.

or
Deal breakers must be breakable.