blog Q and A

For some reason I felt compelled to do this.

Q: And me? (Because remember, it's all about me.)
A: It is all about you.

Q: What grad programs (and young men) have you decided on?
Utah, Ohio, Houston, Michigan, plus one or two. As for the young men. . . they exist.

Q: Yeah, you owe us all some info. . . men that exist in real life???
A: A girl has to move on. Especially when Jake Gyllenhaal turns out too short.

Q: Was number seven directed towards me and recent occurrences?
A: No. Number eight.

Q: I guess I'm out of touch, but what was your brother supposed to be?
A: Well, I asked for either a sister or a dog. They came later.

Q: Did you wear your sexy Velma glasses with your dirt costume?
A: No. But I was still sexy.

Q: Did they play their patented TV theme song medley? Did I spell "medley" right?
A: Yes. Unless you meant M-A-D-L-Y.

Q: You think I trust you to decide for yourself what you're watching and feeling?
A: You don’t trust me to do anything.

Q: But surely there are exceptions?
A: There are always exceptions. Except when there aren’t.

Q: Isn't this a flavor at pudding on the rice?
A: Isn’t everything a flavor at pudding on the rice?

Q: How does one grade poetry, anyhow?
A: One closes one’s eyes and randomly marks the page.

Q: Can you bump up the release date?
A: I could, but then I’d have to kill you.

Q: What's wrong with your last post?
A: Many many things.

Q: Where did you go?
A: Where no wo/man has gone before.

Q: Did I spell "elaborate" right?
A: Yes.

Q: Are you living in a theory world?
A: Against my will. . . I am sent to bid you come into supper.

Q: Is that Diet Nepenthe with Lime? What Hitchcock movie was it? Are you serious about the seven-yr.-crush? My heart throws itself into a garbage disposal in empathy for you. Isn't it strange how the people who are so wonderful to you and who you care so much about are the ones who make your life so crappy?
A: Is there any other kind? I hope it was Psycho. Yes. And yes.

Q: Is "treats" a Utahism?
A: Yes. And apparently so is everything else that comes out of my mouth.

Q: Poetry?
A: What else is there?

Q: Do you look disapprovingly at people over the top of them?
A: Isn’t that why one wears glasses?

Q: Does this mean you're going to fob all night tonight?
A: And party every day.

Q: The real world is scary, but so what?
A: So you ignore it and read lots of things that replace the real world. Try it. You’ll like it.

Q: Did I mention you're beautiful?
A: No. Say it again, Sam.

Q: Is it a poem? For if it isn't, will you make it one?
A: It is a poem. Now. Look at me being all obedient and stuff.

Q: Can I please join your support group?
A: Email me with a statement of intent. Preferably one I can use for my grad school apps.

Q: Is that too sappy?
A: Yes.

Q: Isn't it cute when they try to make sense of these things?
A: Cute isn’t the word I’d use to describe it.

Q: Can't you come up with better reasons than that?
A: Apparently not.

Q: And can we mention she's played by the incomparable Emma Thompson?
A: She’s played by the incomparable Emma Thompson.

Q: How exactly does one simultaneously account for an event that *did* occur and several events that could have?
A: The Fob Pantheon. That and Zizek.