and sometime others will celebrate for you

I have the best family.

sometimes you have to make your own celebration

At the point in the waiting process, it feels like my mailbox is mocking me. I'm pretty sure it is. I know Utah sent out acceptances last week. Nothing. No thing. Nada.

Well, nothing from Utah. I did get something from my work benefits plan, my electricity bill, and some exciting mailers from a local dentist. Why he felt the need to send me three, I'll never know.

Ohio and Denver should start making offers this week or next, but those chances are slim.

I'm turning into a crazy person. And I don't like it. This isn't cool crazy. This is crazy crazy. Staring down the cell phone crazy. Checking the same three sites for acceptance updates over and over again. It was on the hour. Now it's every 15 minutes when I'm at work. I'm not sure what I'm going to do at work when this is all over.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do when this is all over. And I'm not sure what I'll be doing after June 17 (graduation). But I do know what I'm going to be doing in one month:

(do you want to guess?)

I'm going to make my way down to South Carolina to see Anna and Brooke and celebrate. Celebrate me getting old, Anna getting older, and anything else I feel like celebrating.

I think a paper chain is in order.

good things happened today

There's a room on campus called (appropriately) the Great Room. It's a mini-dining hall. Decent food, excellent surroundings, and usually very quiet. I like to go there to write on my lunch break. Yesterday I needed to write. Too bad I had already committed my lunch to picking up a Very Large Book from my thesis advisor.

But I needed to write, and I felt that I should inform Thesis Advisor of my DENY from UIC, so I emailed him, begging forgiveness and asking if I could come today. And in the postscript, I included a note about the DENY. And yes, it has to be all in caps every time.

But this set the stage for good things to happen today.

Thesis Advisor couldn't meet me until 3:00 this afternoon. The walk from my office to his and back to my office is a decent fifteen minutes, give or take a cold wind. Add to that a few minutes for chatting, and I was going to be gone at least a half hour at the end of the day. My plan was to eat lunch at my desk to make room for the half hour, but that was thwarted when my boss and I got a table at Einsteins (a rare feat), so we stayed and chatted and used the hour.

On the way back from lunch, I mentioned (again) to Boss that I needed to pick up this Very Large Book at 3:00. And then I said I was thinking of not coming back to work, going home to check the mail, and maybe get up the nerve to call schools.

So at 3:00, I left work, and picked up my (wait for it) Very Large Book from Thesis Advisor, and talked with him a little about the remaining schools. This conversation began my good things. He told me he was surprised I had been DENY'd, he told me that I was going to graduate on time with a solid thesis, he told me that he feels my thesis could be the solid core of a solid book of poetry, and he called himself my mentor. This is not a man who says things lightly. And all this happened in time for me to catch the 3:30 bus home.

Except I didn't go home. I didn't check my mail, and I didn't call schools. I called Chris, who sometimes answers his phone, and today he did. After he gave me grief for not being at worked, I asked him what his plans for the afternoon were. His response: "Oh, I'm going to see a movie with you." And so we did. I got off at the next stop, walked over to his place, left the Very Large Book, and we made it to the 3:40 show. We were in a nearly empty theater, at matinee prices, and laughed our way through a thoroughly ridiculous show.

It was just what both of us needed.

So then I came home, checked the mail--and there was nothing. No emails while I was out either. But I'm not completely discouraged yet.

That will come next week.